I used to listen “Good Times with Mo Twister” at Magic 89.9 for almost a year and I’m amazed in picking up new ideas and they’re playing good songs, mostly alternative songs. Then yesterday, they introduce an experimental segment wherein they played some old songs but with a twist. They played the song “Rainbow Connection”, originally from The Muppets in the Sesame Street and revived by Sarah Mclachlan. It soothes in my mind when I first heard the song and it reminds me of singing that song with my son when he grows up but in reality, I can’t sing that song with him anymore. Maybe I have to turn back the time so that I could be with him, hug him tightly like there’s no tomorrow, hears his voice and crying out loud. But there is a time also that I have to turn back the time because I remember the moments and serves as an inspiration or a reminder to me that sometime in the course of my life, Baby Raphael came to my life and makes me a complete man.
On September 15, 2009, my wife Jennifer gave birth to our Baby Raphael in CS. When I saw my son and I have plans for him when He grows up. We can make a walk to a nearby park and play with him. Maybe I can teach him how to drive a car or teach him how to cook when he grows up. But my plans for him was melted like ice when my Baby Raphael passed away last November 8, 2010 due a digestive infection considering Hirschprung’s Disease. It is a hard time for us to recover and cope up with the situation especially my wife for we have to conquer the sorrow that we face, the pain that we feel, the loneliness from the loss on our son and tears of losing hope. A friend of mine said, “Isang taon pa lang kayong kasal eh parang naka-sampung taon na kayo.” Hard to believe but yes indeed, we made a long mile of pain but it strengthens our relationship as husband and wife and as an individual.
It’s a good thing that we’re both members of the Couples For Christ community. Our friends in the community comfort us where we are in great pain especially when we are in stages of accepting that Baby Raphael is gone. They helped us in coping up with the sorrows that we faced and reminded us that God has plans for us. Before, we thought that it was the end of the world when Raphael is gone but our friends in the community told us that we’re still fortunately that we had the privileged of having Baby Raphael is our lives. And in one of our reflections, I realized that we’re still fortunate that we became full-time parents even in a short span of time. We’re fortunate that I became a father and my wife became the mother of our child and we’re proud of that.
Whenever we cried especially when we remember him, I thought that my wife cried a lot rather than me, but it turns out to be that I had cried a lot more that her. You maybe thought that it was a exaggeration or something but truly, I cried a lot especially when I remember him because of the fact that I missed him so much. I thought that in this time, he must be 6 months-old and playing around the house whenever I came home from work and spend quality time to them. But then and again, I realized that something’s lacking, something’s missing. Yes indeed, I missed him so much. I told to myself that we’ll be drinking beer, play the guitar and singing aloud when we see each other in heaven in due time but suddenly God reminded me that we’ll have to enjoy life to the fullest and wait for the coming of his baby brother or sister when the time comes.
All of us are blessed by God and we thank God because of the life that He shared to us. I thank God for the life that He shared and giving us Baby Raphael as our son. It was a short time for us to be with him until his demise but we cherished the memories that we shared with him, the love that we feel and the happiness that we treasured to the rest of our lives.
“We love you so much, Baby Raphael! We miss you!” – Daddy Eric and Mommy Jenny
My Baby Raphael